Yoko [entries|friends|calendar] Ben Jammin [ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ] [ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

[19 Sep 2008|07:28am] after all its just aloha for now.... +comment

i dont have many dreams and aspirations... [26 Jun 2008|09:57pm] [ music | jack johnson ] So it all boils down to me. I am here. In okinawa Japan alone. well not alone there are other human beings here but now i am emotionally alone. I do almost everything alone. and im going to be okay with that. I will paddle out by myself and be happy. as long as you are happy. and thats all that matters. How i long for the good and the bad that comes with san diego, if only to go back, but if i went back i would not be the person i am today. Is that a good thing or a bad thing. Im not sure. I quit smoking this monday. It is now Thursday night. Its not bothering me soo much. I think about it every so often but i have taken up drinking more. Do you notice that once you quit one thing you are more avid on the next bad habit you have? that's what happened when i had to stop smoking the greens; more ciggarettes and beeru. At least i dont dip. I am only human, and i dont have many dreams or aspirations like the next guy in line, but i do have them. well one. and i want to document it, because it seems that only one person can truly feel me and believe that my dream is realistic, maybe not idealistic, but it sure is realistic and i can make it happen. you know i never cared for money. or material things for that matter because growing up i never had any of those two things. 2012 its on. I want to drop everything and move to Bahli. I want nothing more than my surf board, a spear/sling for fishing, and a shack or a hut on the beach. If not bahli i want to be somewhere secluded, somewhere remote where noone knows who i am. I dont want to have any worries, I want to surf all day and sleep under the stars. When it rains the tropical rainstorms ive already encountered, i want to position big green leaves to catch my water like a waterfall into the empty coconut shells that i've hollowed and eaten to store my water in. I want to fish for my food and wrap my feast in banana leaves and smoke them in a hole in the sand. I want to lay by waterfalls and fall alseep while the mist and wind from the falls blows on my face as i lay on that moist flat rock. I want to be free. 101| +comment

[30 Apr 2008|06:46pm] HELLO! hello! HELLO! greetings from okinawa Japan. Okay so better greetings since the last time i wrote. Which i AM going to delete. hahah i guess we all have those moments where we need to vent and need to delete ya deeg? So anyway.. My flight to alaska leaves at 6 in the morning tomorrow :) and im so excited because we're flying commercial and not on a tanker.. :)))))))) so we're going to be in alaska for about 3 weeks and we're coming back on the 23rd HOPEFULLY. Its ging to be a good break from this little rock they call an island. I guess uyen and michelle are in the works of coming to okinawa to kick it OK styLE! yeee boi! i cant wait until u two get here. Who ever wants to come kick it sd style in Ok... hollla! (tell me)! i would love to be the host for ur japan experience. Anywhooooo nothing new here just going to alaska coming back and kickin it hopefully trying to save money and get a place. okay thats all i can think of right now. +comment

[20 Apr 2008|08:50pm] So my life definately sucks. i want to get the fuck off this fucking island and go back to san diego. Im tired of men. I hate men. Or maybe its me. I hate myself i cant even keep a man. I mean i guess its not about men... but still you know everyone wants companionship. and i miss that. And i miss guys that i actually like. and i miss not having to compete with japanese girls. So from now on.... i dont know i dont even care. +comment

[22 Jan 2008|11:18am] [ mood | crushed ] [ music | postal service ] I dont like to go to the dining facility because of people, plus the food is bad. I hate the track that my life is on right now. I want to get off this stupid ass island and get away from the military. I need to go to australia. SOMEONE SAVE ME. I wish love didnt hurt so bad, if i knew how bad it hurt I would've never allowed myself to love. Love is overrated. 101| +comment

[28 Oct 2007|07:15am] [ music | the strokes ] I am a liar. well i am too younge and they are too old the joke is on you this place a zoo you're right its true. +comment

[26 Sep 2007|12:52pm] I feel a little betrayed. ... i wish i never found out. sometimes you just want things to go perfect. like they said, curiosity killed the cat. In this case, my heart. :[...... 101| +comment

[10 Sep 2007|09:39am] [ music | half way home- jason mraz ] i dont want to go back to japan. I love you so much. +comment

[23 Jul 2007|04:57pm] It's hard being a human. Any human. i feel like alfalfa... "i will not think of darla i will not think of darla. maybe froggys right i shouldnt think of love. all its gotten me is friction and a buck naked chase." It really sucks to be me right now. - from the wise words of a man by Nacho Libre. +comment

[16 Jan 2007|07:09pm] [ music | nate dogg never leave me alone ] so im here in wicha hell texas... i started class last week and it's pretty unreal. Ill be loading bombs... and missiles.. and maintaining f-15's,.... and soon to be f 22's.... uh sweet? yea i quess so.. im going to cross trainafter 4 and a half years anyway. I really do like being in the airforce but i hate being here in wichita. So my first base is Cadena AFB in Okinawa Japan... i think im turning japanese i think im turning japanese i really think so.... YAYYY!!! im o excited for that.. i mean the drinking age is ..theres NO drinking age ayyY! Hoouaa!! ahahha but yea... i love my boyfriend...he's so perfect... umm what else is there to write about.. i just write in here to let out emotions and write random things because im too lazy to write with a pen or pencil. hmm let me see the first thing that comes to my head is... adam... i love him. i cant think of anything else. oh yeah... PHASE 2 yayy!!!!! tonight at 2000 i phase up to phase 2 which is a helluva lot better than pahse one.. and in less than a month phase three!!! yess!! like civilians... dude you take everything for granted... you dont know what you have until you lose it.. trust me.. I lost everything ..... and when you get it back,,, you appreciate it more and more and more. its insane. But i think its made me some what of a better person. I cant wait to graduate in like 14 weeks and ... 3 days? april 27th here i come... damn i have sooo much homework,... ill do it later. Im still a procrastinater.. but hey the food here is free... this feeling is so wonderful. Im in love. and its real. i love being in love... especially with my wonderful perfect boyfriend adam hennings... hes so great and sweet... and would do me dirty.... damn i love him. awww.... okay i cant think of anything else but him.. im done. +comment

[01 Jan 2007|12:05pm] [ music | stunnin like my daddy ] HAPPY NEW YEARS O7 YAAHHhh!!!! hoot... new years... hooot. i hope everyones new years was good... damn it seems like just yesterday it was 2006's new years... i seriously remember some of it like it was yesterday.... that was a fuckin drunk ass new years.. this was the first new years in a long time that i wasnt drunk.... but you know what.... its okay i still had fun ... giving my drunk baby a kiss MMMmMMmHmmmmm hes soooo cute...... i look funny in the last picture... but dang aww hes soo cute +comment

[24 Dec 2006|08:18am] so im here in tech school i totally graduated bmt like last friday or something like that december 15th. Everything is fine. havent started classes yet until january ninth. So its chillin.... ummm met a boy. mmhmmm his name is adam hennings... but at tech school ...... im fuckin tired of all the males here already only 4 days in because they dont stop hitting on you no matter who u are what you look like.... just because ur a female theyll hit on you.. it sucks but i got my man... hes hot.. ill post a picture just to brag later. ahahahha jk! alright peace. oh yea merry xmas +comment

[23 Nov 2006|11:25am] all is well in basic military training happy thanksgiving! +comment

so much on my mind that i can't recline [27 Oct 2006|12:56pm] [ music | mos def & talib kweli ] ( See ya when i see ya ) +comment

[13 Oct 2006|09:16am] [ music | blondie ] Last night was like such a crazy night... then again ive been saying that for the past like 3 weeks. LIVEJOURNAL IS SO GAYY!!! BUT I CONTINUE TO READ IT! +comment

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